Chapter 6

Chapter 6
Unexpected


By Tuesday I was forced out of the covers and back into real life. I took an extra long time getting ready and by the time I came downstairs Jeremy had left on a job. I was relieved. In fact, everyone had gone out that day. Papa and Mama had gone Christmas shopping, while Roger, Megan, and little Eliza went to visit friends. There was a note on the counter from Mama telling me she hoped I felt better soon and that I had food warming in the oven. I ate heartily and washed the remaining dishes up. I didn’t quite no what to do with myself. My body ached all over and my mind was a constant drip of thoughts. I set to thinking what would work the kinks out of both and decided that the best thing a body could do was to make herself useful. My room had become mussed from the days spent there and so I decided I would give it a good and proper cleaning. I found the large tin bucket on the back porch, filled it with warm soapy water, and headed back up the stairs to make my room sparkle. I stripped the bed, washed the windows, floor, and walls, dusted everything that stood still, put clean sheets back on the bed, and even rearranged some of the smaller furniture. I also discarded old clothes, shoes, hats, and jewelry I no longer wore. I sat in the middle of my floor sparkling as much as the room from the sweat I had worked up. I was quite satisfied with myself, and I indeed felt better. Slowly getting to my feet I grabbed the dirty water that needed to be dumped. Once my task was done I checked my watch and groaned. Not nearly enough time had passed. I was mulling over what I would do next when a knock came to the door that about scared me out of my wits.
I was half expecting Jeremy to be behind the door and I held my breath as I opened it. To my surprise their stood Nate with a basket full of all sorts of goodies. The air I had been holding quickly escaped my lungs and the tension built up in my body relaxed.

“Nate! What a pleasant surprise. Please come in!”

“I don’t be meanin’ to bother you Ms. Cindy but I told your folks I would drop these here purchases they made earlier today over to the house. They said you’d be home and that I should just come on over when it best suited.”

Nate passed the front door and went toward the kitchen with his bundle. I intended to follow him when I caught glimpse of myself in the hallway mirror. I was horrified at what a complete mess I was.

“Nate, please excuse me for just a moment. I have spent the better part of the morning cleaning my room and I look a fright. Give me five minutes and I will put on some tea.”

“Well, Ms. Cindy I was thinkin’ you looked mighty fine, don’t go fixin’ up on my account. I would be glad to put these groceries away and put a hot pot on while you freshen up.”

Blushing under the compliment I told him that would be just fine and rushed up to recover some dignity. By the time I had come back downstairs Nate had all the groceries put in their proper place, had set out some ginger cookies, two tea cups, and was just setting the water to boil. I smiled at this gentle man and his care to detail. As the day progressed I felt my sanity slowly coming back and I owed a great deal to this lovely and unexpected visit from Nate. “Thank you Lord for this good man”, I whispered. As soon as I said it, my heart gave a strange flutter. This was the first time I had prayed to God since the accident. I hadn’t even realized I had been crying until Nate looked at me.

“Ms. Cindy I think you better take a sit down. I’m afraid you’ve overworked your body some. I know you haven’t been feelin’ well and I expect you’ve gone and done more than one should when they are first gettin’ back on their feet.”

He proceeded to take me to a dining room chair and got me good and settled. Before he returned to the now whistling teapot he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and gave it to me. I sat in that chair and traced the faded initials on the well worn fabric. The clinking of Nate in the kitchen was soft and soothing. He was humming lightly to himself. Who was this man that showed such gentle kindness and care? I felt a strange uncertainty and peace sweep over me as I pondered this thought. My thoughts were soon interrupted as Nate came through the kitchen door tea and cookies in hand.

“Now, Ms. Cindy you are lookin’ a might better. It seems that lovely color has come back into your cheeks. We get some cookies and tea in ya and you will be right as rain.”

The afternoon of tea and cookies and easy flowing conversation with Nate was wonderful, and just what my soul needed. I felt refreshed and found myself humming my own little tune as I cleaned up the dishes. Nate had talked about the store and growing up helping his Grandpa in the early days.

“I learned the character of a man in those days Ms. Cindy. About what it meant to work hard and how to treat others with a kind hand and gentle smile. That if you give your best then you have done your best. My Grandfather was the best person I’ve known. I’m grateful for those times…”

He stopped, tears brimming in his eyes. I grabbed his hand without thinking and placed the handkerchief he gave me back into the palm of it. He held my hand just a little while and stroked it with his thumb. “I be thankin’ ya Ms. Cindy…” was all he managed. We said our goodbyes and I promised I would be in the store soon, before Christmas. He took my hand once more, something I never knew Nate to do, looked deep into my eyes, and wished me well. I had to turn away my face flooding with warmth.
Mama and Papa were the first to return. Mama rejoiced at my returned health and marveled at what a fine job I had done to my room. She kissed me on my forehead and gave me a strong hug. Papa was equally pleased with my accomplishments and commented that it was good to see his little girl getting back to her old self. I did feel good and felt like I had turned a big milestone. I was happy to share it with everyone and was very anxious to talk to Jeremy. Roger, Megan, and Eliza returned for supper and we had wonderful family conversation, something we hadn’t had in quite awhile. Megan shared on how good it was to see old friends and Mama gushed about the festive shopping excursion. I pretended not to notice the side glances given to others in the room when I talked about my afternoon with Nate. My feelings for Jeremy hadn’t changed even though he had hurt me so. I wanted to make things right with him. I cleaned the supper dishes with purpose and nervously watched the ticking clock and wondered when he would return.

With the stroke of 10pm I stubbornly headed to my newly cleaned and arranged room and wrestled with clean sheets and bad dreams. The restlessness turned to weariness and in the wee hours of the morning I slipped into unconsciousness. Even though I had only a few hours of fitful sleep I was up with the sun. I assumed that Jeremy had spent the evening with neighbors and would be arriving for breakfast. I wanted to make sure I was ready for him.

He didn’t. Instead, a letter arrived saying that he had found some work in a neighboring town and wouldn’t be back until the 23rd. He promised to be home before the tree cutting and decorating. My heart fell into my toes as great big tears blurred the words on the small handwritten note. “What have I done,” I thought to myself. “He is staying away because of me. Oh, God please help me. Let Jeremy come back; let me be able to explain. Please, Lord! Please…” Tears flowed easily as I gave my simple prayer to God. I felt as if my insides were being turned outside and I knew I needed a quiet place to think. I told Mama I was going for a walk and bundled up against the cold December day.

Snow crunched under my quick steps as my thoughts fluttered around me like the big white snowflakes falling soft and quiet to the ground. I hugged myself and let my legs lead the way; they seemed to know where I was going better than I did. When they finally came to a stop a knot caught in my throat as I looked up and realized that I had stopped in front of the church. Desperately trying to get my emotions in check I traversed the front steps and tested the door, it was unlocked. The warmth of the church was rich and fragrant and I soon melted out of my coat and gloves and placed them on a hook before entering the quiet sanctuary. The burning candles made shadows dance along stained glass. The pine floor creaked under my wet shoes as I made my way to the front altar. The legs that had brought me with such purpose to the spot gave way from underneath me and I fell to my hands and knees in a great sob. There at that altar God and I worked things through. I promised to leave my bitterness, pain, and anger at His feet, and in turn He wrapped His loving arms around me and comforted His child like only He could. My walk with the Lord changed there on my knees. In that moment I knew that He would always be first in my life. I knew He was there with me all the time, through death there is always new life. He truly works the best out the ashes and a penitent heart. I arose feeling fresh, full, and complete. I spent the walk home looking at the world with new eyes and renewed hope. This Christmas was truly going to be magical.